How to Have Friends (and Live Like the Peanuts)

WikiHow has this wonderful article about how to have friends (and live like the peanuts). if you want to get shitted on, be Charlie Brown. he’s cool…PSYCHE! This wonderful article has the Warning: “In today’s age of sex, drugs, and violence, this could be difficult to pull off past age 8.” Which begs the question, why not try it until you’re old? I’m sure there is Charlie Brown-related fetish porn out there. Don’t look, I’ve tried. nothing on the web, yet. probably will be as creepy as Erotic Falconry: erotic images with falcons. so here goes the steps:

First, figure out which Peanut you are:
Charlie Brown. Good ol’ Charlie Brown, owner of Snoopy, he’s dependable, sensitive, and has a very round head. And, of course, a surprisingly good sense of humor.
Lucy Van Pelt. Lucy is pretty, crabby, and a little demanding. She loves to boss her little brother, Linus, around, and flirt with Schroeder. She is also famous for her ‘crabby psychiatric help’
Linus Van Pelt. Lucy’s blanket-obsessed little brother, Linus is cute and innocent- he believes in the great pumpkin, treasures his blanket, and makes hot chocolate by dipping brown crayons in hot water.
Schroeder. Schroeder is a phenomenal pianist, does not return Lucy’s feelings, and… plays baseball, like all the other Peanuts.
Snoopy. The narrator of the play, Snoopy is funny, sweet, and imaginative. He loves to pretend that he’s the ‘flying ace’
Sally Brown. She’s Charlie’s sister who is in love with his best friend, Linus. She’s cute, has that “Brown sense of humor”, and is bvery contemporary.
Pigpen. He’s the dirtiest boy in the world, but has a heart of gold. He doesn’t shower often, but he can be counted on.
Frieda. She’s famous for her naturally curly hair. Although others may describe her as vain, she is a good friend. She plays baseball like all the other peanuts.
And, of course, there are many other Peanuts characters such as Marcie, Peppermint Patty, and Franklin! Feel free to add their descriptions.
Next, find some true friends (aka creepers). You can tease each other in fun, but at the end of the day, you’re always BFFs. To find them, look around you neighborhood(it’s always good to live in close vicinity of each other) for other kids who seem like they could use a friend, and talk to them. They won’t turn you down.
Next, try classically fun activities such as snowball fights and hot chocolate in the cold weather, playing sports, singing songs, acting in plays, or giving ‘crabby psychiatric help’.
Get the Attitude. A positive one. Be nice to everybody, but do joke around a lot. That’s what Peanuts is all about! Just relax and don’t be in too much of a hurry to grow up. Love life, and life will love you back.
Have several ‘running jokes’ in your life, such as Linus’ Great Pumpkin theory(which went on for about 40 years) and The Baseball Team That Never Wins(also nearly half a century. Never gets old.)
If you’re a Charlie Brown, get a beagle and love him/her to bits. Points if said beagle is really quirky.